Room 429, Wednesday Night

[the_merriest]

Reno and Rikku	Okay. So. It had been a while since Rikku and Reno had gone on their one and only date. Which... had been rained out. Go figure. And so they were going to do this right. They were. Another attempt at dinner, in Reno's room because it was fun to socialize with the new pet around, and it was gonna be good.
Mako	Except for the ferret prancing in the food. That had somehow managed to ruin the meal.
Reno	And so, off Reno went again, on a solemn quest to get something to replace that which once was almond chicken. Maybe next time, he'd keep the ferret in the cage while they were trying to have a picnic on the freaking floor. He really didn't think anything of it when he left his phone behind. Not like he needed it to go questing for good Wutai Chinese cuisine. Naturally, it was when Reno wasn't around to answer it that it decided to up and ring.
Rikku (and Mako)	Rikku was stretched out, wrestling the ferret, when Reno's phone rang. She was going to be a good girl and not ... ... hang on, that was Rude's ringtone. Reno totally wouldn't mind if she chatted with Rude. She could tell him about the ferret and ask for some good blackmail material. So Rikku scooped up Reno's phone and flipped it open with a grin. "Reno's House of Porn and Ferret-Wrestling. Come on down for a great deal on lesbians or a brand-new ferret. Honk if you love our prices!"
Tseng	As fate would have it, Reno happened to have the same ringtone assigned to all of the Turks. It wasn't too confusing, really. There were only three of them, after all. Tseng, evidentally, wasn't as amused by Rikku's greeting. Even if something in the background seemed to be thrilled. He'd ask about the honk later. When it was actually Reno on the other end of the line. "Reno," he said, and it was mostly a request. Mostly.
Rikku	Oh shit. Oh shit. Okay. Not Rude. Someone else had Rude's phone!? ... Shit. Shit. Shit. Probably his boss. "I'm sorry, you have the wrong number?" she tried.
Tseng	"Unlikely," came a somewhat dry reply. Perhaps if Rikku listened closely, she could hear Tseng raise his eyebrow skeptically. He was certainly doing his best to portray that fact as he worked through his next reply. After all, there were only so many girls out there likely to have access to Reno's phone. Therefore... "Rikku, I presume."
Rikku	"You have Rude's phone," Rikku announced, sounding very put out about it. "You should give it back. That's not nice."
Tseng	"I assure you," Tseng replied evenly, "I'm calling Reno from my own phone."
Rikku	"Fine," she said. No use arguing the point. "Doesn't matter. He's not here. He'll call when he gets back." She hesitated. She should just hang up. He had that caller-id display-thing on his phone. But she was kinda curious now. Rude's ringtone, and he sounded grouchy. That meant ... "Is this Tseng?"
Tseng	"Indeed." Ah, so Reno had mentioned him to Rikku. Tseng wasn't certain if he should be flattered, or concerned over the level of openness that Reno shared with this girl. He settled for a comfortable mix of the two, one part flattery, eleven parts concern. It seemed even enough, to him. At least until he got some sort of grasp of who this girl was, in any case. "Where's Reno?"
Rikku (and Mako)	"He ran into town for more Chinese," she said with a shrug. "The ferret got into the food. Kinda wrecked the picnic." She was, apparently, not paying enough attention to Mako, who proceeded to honk and chitter at her toes. "Heyyyy," she grinned, reaching her fingers down for him to sniff. "Who got into the food? Was it you? I think it was you. Who's gonna get it?"
Tseng	"The ferret?" Tseng's eyebrow? Still raised upward significantly. Perhaps more than it had been a moment before. "I suppose it's yours?" Tseng was many things. Nosy, it would seem, was one of those things today.
Rikku	"Nooo, I have a cat," Rikku said, arching one of her own eyebrows. "I thought you government people were supposed to be good at information. Wasn't all of this covered in the dossier?" Just in case he thought she was some kind of an idiot, here.
Tseng	"Reno hasn't gotten around to sending me a dossier on you," Tseng replied, perhaps slightly more surprised than he should have been that she knew about the dossiers he'd requested in the first place. Naturally, this didn't mean he wasn't well-informed. Rude, after all, was a wealth of information all on his own. "So Reno has a ferret." ... Whatever that was. Apparently, they honked.
Rikku	"He never sent one?" Rikku said, coolly. "You asked for those, like, months ago. That kinda sucks." She was terribly concerned. She was sure he could tell. "There you are, some kinda government guy, and you don't know piles and piles of useless information about me. Man, you might not even know my blood type. That's gotta be rough." Government people. They didn't need to know how what hole you fastened your belt on, but gosh darn it, why couldn't they have a three-page write up about it, anyway?
Tseng	"Somehow," Tseng mused, lifting Rude's dossier on Rikku just to hunt down her blood type for spite, "I think I'll manage. Is there any particular reason why Reno doesn't have his PHS on him at the moment?" Not having his phone could be problematic. Especially in situations such as this one, where people might actually want to get in touch with Reno.
Rikku	"He probably forgot," she said dryly. "It's like ten, fifteen minutes to town. There aren't usually bandersnatches waiting on the path there. Which is a shame, 'cause that'd make going to town a little more exciting. He really never sent one? I thought you got all 'grr, send me a dossier or you have to come back and do more evil crap' at him."
Tseng	Tseng's eyebrow? Still quirked very, very high up on his face. Evil crap. Oh, excellent. "He never did send one, no." There was a pause, while he mulled over the rest of his response. "I believe he's more than slightly enamored with you." An understatement if ever Tseng had spoken one.
Rikku	Strangely, that made her feel ... better. Safer. Like he was trying to stand between her and his boss. She should thank him, for that, when he got back. If she wasn't in too much trouble for answering his phone. "Maybe he is," she said softly, not wanting this guy to have any freaking ammunition, dammit. "Maybe he just didn't know why you needed one. Why do you, anyway? 'Hey, her blood type might allow me to determine that she's totally a dangerous criminal type who shouldn't be associating with one of my underlings.' And then you tell him to never see me again? Is that how it goes?"
Tseng	"I suppose that would depend entirely on who you are, as opposed to what you've done in the past." If his eyebrow raised any farther, Tseng might have wound up with a new part in his hair. "I'm more interested in your intentions. As opposed to your blood type." He could have mentioned that he was well aware of her history concerning the governing body of Spira. But that, really, would have been counterproductive.
Rikku	"My intentions?" Rikku was going to stare at the phone for a few seconds. "Oh my gosh, you sound like my dad. This isn't where you ask if I seduced him, is it? I mean. Have you met Reno?"
Tseng	"Once or twice," came Tseng's dry response. "Though I'm more concerned about Reno's safety than I am about his sex life." Honestly. Reno's sex life was none of Tseng's concern. Reno could do it ten times a day and twice that on Sundays if he wanted, so long as he showed up for work on time. And alive.
Rikku	"You think I'm going to stab him in the middle of the night?" Rikku said, raising an eyebrow of her own. "I mean, I'm not going to. Unless you know something about his sex life that I don't." Because if he did, then Reno was a dead bitch and that was just how things went, right there.
Tseng	"So far as I can tell, Reno's been faithful to you," Tseng replied, and yes, there was a sort of sour note in that, if only because Tseng was finding himself less inclined to give this girl the benefit of the doubt the more she continued speaking. It possibly didn't help that he wasn't thrilled with Rikku to begin with. Because, really, Reno, with a girlfriend. "You wouldn't be the first individual to get close to a Turk with the intention of ending his life, if you were planning on doing so." He figured he ought to point this out. Just in case she wasn't aware that he had damn valid reason to be paranoid, here.
Rikku	"I'm dating him," she said, just as sourly. "I'm really sorry that that makes it hard for you to be an evil government whatever-the-hell-you-are. And I know there was some girl who went after Rude, and Reno wanted to kick her ass for it. But I'm not even from your world. I mean, do you realize that? That just maybe, this has nothing to do with you being Turks and it's just about Reno?"
Tseng	"Then perhaps I'm concerned about where Reno's loyalties are going to rest when it does come down to our being Turks."
Rikku	There was a long, grouchy sort of silence, only interrupted for a stray honk or two. "I know, I know," Rikku said, scooping up Mako and nuzzling him. "I know, I'm not paying you any attention at all. I'm terrible." She sighed, loudly, into the phone. "Right. He's allowed to date me, but if you randomly decided he should stab me in my sleep, then he should go 'yes, sir, of course, sir' and do it. I forgot. Turk freaking loyalty." Rikku was not a huge fan of the Turks at the moment, no.
Tseng	Tseng's eyebrow was no longer migrating into his hairline. It was now furrowed along with the other one while he pinched his nose and did his best to bite his tongue. "And do you see any reason why I should order Reno to stab you in your sleep?" Sometimes, Tseng wasn't so great at biting his tongue.
Rikku	"You need a reason?" Rikku shot back. "You're the government. Since when do you need reasons to kill people? I'm Al Bhed, there's a good one. Oh, hey, I took down a government once. There's another one! And, you know, you're not really sure about Reno's loyalty, and maybe that means he won't kill people for you any more. Can't have that! You'd have to train someone else and break them into pieces. Way easier to send Rude out here with a sniper rifle. Right!?"
Tseng	To hell with it. Tseng wasn't going to bite his tongue if this child was going to make it her personal mission to tear him apart over the phone. He had just been calling to remind Reno to get his report in on time, damn it. He didn't need this garbage today. Or ever. At all. "There isn't exactly a wealth of Turks to choose from at the moment," he said, and to a trained ear it might actually manage to sound slightly like he was snapping, past all the calm, calculating, somewhat annoyed pitch. "Considering the amount he's told you about his line of work, I can only assume that you're also aware of the current state that Gaia is sitting in, at the moment. We need him here. Not for any assassinations." Yet. "But because him being on that damn island has been nothing but a waste of time since he arrived there."
Rikku	"You know," Rikku said, very, very sweetly, "if you don't want my Blessed Gem, you should send it back already." It wasn't like she had loads of those just lying around or anything.
Tseng	There was a pause, while Tseng opened the drawer on his desk that the gem was tucked away inside. And another pause while he pulled it out and carefully turned it over in his hand. And another still, while he searched for the proper words. "This stone actually casts Holy?"
Rikku	Those words, it would seem, were the proper ones, at just that moment. "Reno said it saved your world, once," she shrugged, feeling strangely self-conscious. "I only had one left, but -- I told him to take it. If Holy really can save your world, then ... you need it more than I do, yeah?"
Tseng	In spite of his best efforts, Tseng suddenly found himself hating Reno's girlfriend - and that was still such an insane concept on his own - less than he had been hating her merely a moment before. "If anything like Meteorfall occurs again," he replied, finding it difficult to keep that angry edge in his voice as he stared at the stone, "it could possibly save the world again." Gaia had developed a most irksome habit of being in desperate need of saving at least once every couple of years. Tseng, being the eternal pessimist, was starting to wonder how long it would be before fate decided to trump the damages caused by Meteor and Holy in order to present them with something even worse. That wasn't so unreasonable, was it?
Rikku	"If it happens again," Rikku said, wondering how far she could trust this Tseng guy. Not very far. Right. Okay, then. "Tell Reno, he'll call me, and I'll go get -- someone, and then you won't have to use the stone at all." Stones were one-time-use only. Might as well save that for a rainy day, right?
Tseng	"That would be appreciated," Tseng said, and his voice was just about as earnest as it had ever been as he carefully placed the gem back into his drawer. "I'll be certain to keep that in mind." It was very difficult to hate someone who was offering to assist with any possible future need to save one's world.
Rikku	"I'm not giving you her name," Rikku said quickly. "I'm not telling you anything about her. I don't trust you and I don't want you just deciding you need to bother her for no good reason. I'm not gonna let you anywhere near her. And if I find out that you're trying to dig up information from Reno then I'm totally taking the offer back, do you understand me?" Look, Tseng wasn't the only one with good reason to be paranoid. And the government had tried to execute Yuna, too.
Tseng	"That would be for the best," Tseng agreed, taking a moment to mentally smack himself for letting his mind wander to other such individuals who had the capacity to cast Holy. The less he knew about this girl's friend, all the better for this girl's friend. It was easier to pretend that the opportunity to take someone into custody just hadn't come about yet when one had no idea who it was they should be keeping an eye on. "I'd rather not know." He wasn't eager to end up on surveillance duty in another world. A church in the slums had at least been easily accessible by taking the Sector One train and a short hike.
Rikku	He sounded ... serious. Like he meant that. Okay, that was weird. She couldn't trust him, but at least he wasn't arguing for Yunie's name or anything. Right, then. "Sorry," she said, almost sheepishly. "I, uh. I don't ... trust you. The government, really, but ... you, either." Not considering what she knew he'd asked Reno to do.
Tseng	"I don't expect you to trust me any more than I trust you," he answered. She could have her reasons not to trust him, and Tseng would have his reasons not to trust her. See, things evened out nicely, that way. "I don't like Reno being on that island. But believe it or not, it isn't entirely about you or any need that might arise to have someone hunted down." That was said with almost the slightest air of humor to it. Granted, it was a black sort of humor, dry and crisp and sharp around the edges. But it held the slightest note of bemusement behind it nevertheless.
Rikku	"I know," Rikku shrugged. "I've been helping him look for energy-stuff. And ... I think it's been good for him. Being here, I mean."
Tseng	Tseng had gone and fallen silent, again. His eyes were closed and his index finger and his thumb were practically a permanent fixture against the bridge of his nose, and he couldn't believe he was going to ask what he was about to ask. "I have work to get back to, seeing as Reno isn't available at the moment. But I don't suppose I can ask one favor of you before I leave you to the... ferret?"
Rikku	"That depends on the favor," she said. Hey, he said it was okay not to trust him. She didn't.
Tseng	"Whatever it is that you've been doing that gives him a reason to breathe when he wakes up in the mornings. Keep doing it." And then he shut his PHS without so much as pausing to wait for a reply. He was almost positive he knew what the answer would be, anyhow.
Rikku	It hit her, somewhere in the gut, and she was still struggling for words when the soft click came across. She closed Reno's phone and stared at it as if it would suddenly spring to life and start explaining things to her. Right. Not gonna happen, even in Fandom.

(preplayed with raspberryturk, who is winsauce. just for reno.)

Comments

[raspberryturk]

Aaah, almond chicken. Totally worth the jog into town.

It was an oblivious Reno who was humming with his arms full of Chinese food to knock on the door of his own room. No hands. Almond chicken was freaking important!

[the_merriest]

It took a few seconds for a distracted Rikku to process the knocking. Right. She should ... answer the door. Except answering the phone hadn't gone so well, now had it?

It wasn't likely to be his boss at the door.

So she bounced up, distractedly, still holding on to a wriggling ferret with one hand, and pulled the door open. Cautiously.

"Oh," she said. "Oh, I thought -- hey, you. Come in."

Weird to invite him into his own room.

Weird kinda night.

[raspberryturk]

That was... sort of not the greeting that Reno had been expecting.

"This time, Mako won't go prancin' in the chicken," he promised... Warily. "The wait wasn't too long or nothin', was it?"

The obliviousness was suddenly far less... oblivious than it had been.

[the_merriest]

"No," she said quickly, shaking her head as she shut the door behind him. "No, nothing like that. Uh. Sorry. I'm just ..."

Pause. Might as well get it over with.

"Tseng called," she said.

[raspberryturk]

Reno blinked and then juggled the chicken around, finding a place to set it so that he could pick up the phone. Call display. Good good. No messages. Huh.

"So he did," Reno noted, looking back at Rikku. "Didn't leave a message or nothin', though. Don't gotta call him back right away or anything."

He had this nagging feeling that he was missing something important, here.

[the_merriest]

The floor was interesting. The floor was really neat. That's why she was kicking it. And watching herself kick it. And. Y'know. Because. Nifty floor and all.

"He has ... Rude's ... ringtone," she managed.

Also she was really, really sorry. She was gonna get to that one in a minute. But he could yell first, if he wanted to.

[raspberryturk]

"Oh." Reno blinked at her. And was very quiet for a moment while the implications of that sank in. "All the Turks kinda... got the same ringtone, on my phone."

He was quiet for... another moment.

"Maybe I gotta... change that. Sometime."

And another moment still while he pocketed the phone.

"Uh. How'd that go?"

[the_merriest]

"I h-had no business answering your phone," she said hurriedly. "I know that. You're. You have official important work-things and I had no business answering the phone. I just. I figured it was Rude. And so I was gonna say hi to Rude. I'm sorry. I ..."

Deep breath.

"It ... went?"

[raspberryturk]

Reno was not angry. Reno was worried. There was a drastic difference, at that point. He was trying to keep that very clear in his voice. Not yelling. Just... maybe a little panic. Buried deep.

"Just... went? Like, you're best buddies now, went? Or I should be packin' now, went?"

[the_merriest]

"I ... yelled," she admitted. Wincing. Still entranced by that floor. Damn, it was an interesting floor. "He was all grumpy. About my intentions and your loyalties and you not having your phone and Mako."

Still wriggling in Rikku's arms, Mako had to honk at that. Hey! That was his name! Hi! Hi! Hi!

[raspberryturk]

"Tseng's kinda... always grumpy," Reno replied, nodding a little. And now would be a great time to make his way over to Rikku and Mako, loop his arms around her waist, and maybe rest his forehead against hers. Very good. Okay. Okay? "You okay?"

[the_merriest]

She nodded, swallowing past an odd lump in her throat. Leaning her forehead back against his. "I r-really didn't ... m-mean to. And I know I should've ... hung up. When I realized it. But he was talking and ... then we were yelling and ... and then we weren't, 'cause ... he asked about the gem? The Holy one? And I kinda told him about Yunie. Not her, just ... that I knew someone. And then I said I wasn't telling him anything about her and if he tried to find out about her I'd kill him. I would. He can't ... he's not gonna ... what if he ..."

Shaky breath. Okay. She was okay. Really.

[raspberryturk]

"He won't," Reno murmured into her ear. "He don't got no idea who it is who casts Holy and who doesn't. He's got nowhere to start, even if he wanted to. He can't."

Being reassuring seemed like a higher priority at the moment than digging to find out exactly how much shit he was in because she'd answered his phone.

[the_merriest]

Deep breath. Right. This guy couldn't find Yuna and kidnap her and do scary things to her. Even if he was the government. She hoped. She hoped a lot.

"He ... said something weird, at the end," she said, leaning against him and trying to find words to even ask this. "About how you ... you d-didn't have a reason to breathe, when you ... woke up. Before."

[raspberryturk]

Reno managed, somehow, to go even more quiet than he had been a moment before.

...

Okay. He had to respond to that, somehow. Apparently, responding to it required being a little more... roundabout.

"Couple years back. When I... did bad shit." She knew what bad shit it was that he was referring to, he was sure. "I kinda jumped. No point waitin' for rescue. Everybody was freakin' dead anyhow except Tseng and Rude. You don't move on after that kinda shit. There was the pillar, there was the edge, hundred meters down at least. Run, jump, the end. Got caught, sure. But... You kinda never stop jumpin', after that sorta thing." Deep breath. Just breathing. That was important. "Jumpin', drinkin', smokin', holdin' your breath. Wasn't nothin' before that. After it, there was just... less."

Reno lifted his shoulders a little and loosened his grip on Rikku. He'd totally understand if she wanted to let go, at that point. Talking about the plate wasn't really happy conversation. "Everything went to hell, and it was booze and smokes and sex and violence. It's... different now. Got somethin' to look forward to when I wake up. Easier to breathe."

[the_merriest]

She didn't want to let go. She wanted ... she didn't know what she wanted. But all of this was hitting her like a gutshot and she couldn't breathe.

"Never ... told me," she said, tangling her fingers slightly in his jacket. "You just ... y-you gave up. Because of ... that?"

Because he couldn't forgive himself.

Because of the plate.

[raspberryturk]

"Nothin' was never so empty as everything seemed after that," he replied numbly, tightening his arms around her again without even realizing that he was doing so. "I mean, don't got no right to mope or whine or brag or ... anything. I don't got a right to anything. Kept doin' my job, because Ramuh knows I didn't have nothin' else left. Never had anything before that. Was used to havin' nothin'. Had nothin' all my life, Rikku."

This bore repeating.

"And then I had less. Less than nothin'. Why even try to breathe? You just.. do it. An' that's enough. Because it's somethin', at least."

[the_merriest]

She buried her face against his chest, feeling like her heart was being ripped out.

"It's not fair," she said softly. "You should've had ... and then they made you ... that's ..."

No way out but becoming their Turk. Doing their dirty work.

Except he had had a choice. People always did.

Didn't mean they got good choices.

What a mess.

She squeezed him more tightly. "I'm so sorry."

[raspberryturk]

"Nothin' to be sorry for," he mumbled, pressing his own face into her hair and inhaling. Breathing. He could do that, when she was there. It was the strangest thing...

"Life ain't fair. You're born and everything's shit and you make choices to match and then you die. S'how it works."

And another deep breath. She felt so alive in his arms while the world was spinning in his head, and the smell of her filled his brain, and things were a little less dizzy.

"I used to think it was nothin' but a fairy tale when people talked about someone comin' by that made the shit less... shitty. Turns out, I was wrong. Life ain't fair, and sometimes people get more'n they deserve anyhow, and then they can breathe again, zoto."

[the_merriest]

"It shouldn't be like that," she said, shaking her head. "You're born and ... it's not supposed to be like that. It isn't. I'm so ... sorry. That you've just had this whole ..."

She closed her eyes, fighting for words. Dammit.

"You did some bad things," she said, and wow, was that an understatement. "But that doesn't mean ... you don't deserve to ever have good things. Like being here. I ... I s-said being here was good for you, and he ... didn't disagree, you know?"

[raspberryturk]

"Ain't just here that's been good for me," Reno mumbled into her hair. And if the words he was speaking happened to make any sense at all, that didn't matter in the least, really. "Here's just a place, zoto. Been lots of places. And then we get like this, and I got my arms around you and you're not pullin' away, and... I wanna keep breathin'. Seems like a better idea with every breath, even."

[the_merriest]

She ... her ... her heart stopped and she couldn't breathe and there weren't words for this and she had to be kissing him. Please? Kissing him and ... and ... words could wait, just for right this minute, and so could Mako, and so could the chicken, and so could his boss, and so could everything.

[raspberryturk]

There were, of course, exceptions to Reno's newfound desire to keep breathing. Some things, after all, required a certain amount of holding one's breath. Kissing Rikku was one of those things.

So, somehow, she'd managed to become not only the reason that he breathed, but pretty much the only person he'd hold his breath for, as well. He might as well just sign his lungs over to her. Put a little sign up on his chest, property of Rikku, and that would be that. She could even lease them out if she needed spare change, but they were probably all black and nasty and crap from all the smoking he'd done over the years, so maybe not.

Worth breathing for. Worth holding his breath for. So damn hers.

And then the kiss was over and everything was still spinning, and it was possible that he was still holding his breath.

"He really didn't argue? When you said here's good for me?"

It was going to take him hearing that a couple of times before it would sink in, most likely.

[the_merriest]

"He s-said ..." Okay. Dizzy. Nice to lean on him, when she was. "He s-said that ... whatever I'm doing, that ... helps with the ... breathing? He said I should ... keep doing that, and he ... he hung up."

She bit her lip, looking up at him uncertainly. "When we ... when we had that fight, the really bad one, and I ... I left, was that ... did you s-stop ..."

Right back to not caring if you breathed or not?

[raspberryturk]

"I cried," Reno admitted. He might as well, everything else was coming out anyhow, wasn't it? "Like a fucking baby. Everything was empty and backwards and ... shit. I deserved it. I just don't remember ever cryin' over nothin' before. It was..."

He didn't even know what it was. It was upside-down and it burned in his chest and made him dizzy when he tried to figure it out.

"Everything. After all that nothin', you walked out and I felt everything, right there, like I never made it out and it all landed right on my chest."