Room 308, Sunday Evening, Evilness Afoot

[the_merriest]

There was a small chihuahua sitting on the floor of room 308. The chihuahua was wearing a pretty lacy pink dress and a big floppy hat.

The chihuahua seemed about as thrilled about this as you might imagine him being. Especially since the chihuahua was actually Jamie Madrox.

There was also a videocamera running. Because this sort of thing belong on YouTube.

"Now," Rikku said cheerfully. "We've got two options here. Either you howl along to 'I'm a Little Teapot,' or I let Petey come out and be dumb at you. He might chew on your neck. Choose ... wisely."

It was entirely possible that Rikku had not, in fact, forgiven Jamie for that whole room-swap moving ordeal.

(Door and post both open. Jamie abused with permission, zomg.)

Comments

[multiplez]

Z was walking down the hall when she saw what appeared to be a chihuahua being tortured and paused to ask Rikku, "Okay, seriously, what did the dog do to you?"

[the_merriest]

"He moved all of my stuff into Turtle's room," she said cheerfully. "And he froze my underwear in a big block of ice, except the lingerie, which Turtle's dog chewed up. Never, ever use the Madrox Moving Service."

[multiplez]

"Wasn't planning on..." Z blinked. "That's Jamie?" A slow smile spread across her face. "Seriously?"

[the_merriest]

"You betcha," Rikku grinned. Evilly. "If I can get a good rendition of 'I'm a Little Teapot' or 'The Ants Go Marching,' I'm putting this up on YouTube."

Well. To be honest, this was going on YouTube even if he just whined and got attacked by Petey a few times.

[multiplez]

"...can I get a copy?"

Z bent down to examine the Jamhuahua. "If you sing, it'll go easier for you," she informed him.

[the_merriest]

"Oh, totally," Rikku laughed. "I was gonna sell them, but really, I think I'm just gonna hand them out. People deserve to see this, you know?"

The Jamhuahua growled and whined at Z. He still had his dignity! Sort of! Couldn't she help him? Please?

[multiplez]

Z very gently patted the Jamhuahua's head. "The sooner you sing, the sooner it'll be over." Meaning no, she wasn't going to help him. He was a chihuahua, after all. Evil little beasts.

[the_merriest]

The Jamhuahua growled. He wasn't going to sing, thank you very much.

"Do you really want me to sic Petey on you again?" Rikku sighed. "I mean, it was fun the last two times, but you didn't seem to think so. I'm sure he'd love to play again."

[multiplez]

Z readjusted the Jamhuahua's hat and asked Rikku, "Who's Petey? Is Petey going to lead to hilarity on tape? Please say yes."

[the_merriest]

"Petey's my cat," Rikku bounced. "He's in the closet right now because Petey's very, very dumb and likes to chew on things. Like shoes and toes and chihuahuas."

She knelt down and tried to reason with the Jamhuahua. "Sooooo ... I'm thinking ... either you're gonna sing, or you're gonna run from the stupid kitty some more."

The Jamhuahua needed a minute to think on that one, dammit.

[multiplez]

"Chihuahuas have very small brains," Z said. "That might be why he's being so stubborn." Or it could just be because he was Jamie.

[the_merriest]

"C'moooooon," Rikku said, giggling harder. "It's an easy song. You can just bark along. Ready? Iiiiii'm a little tea-pot! ... You know the song, don't you?"

[multiplez]

"I don't know the song," Z admitted. "My childhood was kind of. Um. Fail."

[the_merriest]

"Oh!" Rikku said, jumping up again. "I'm sorry, I, uh. I mean, I didn't know it from growing up, 'cause ... I'm not from here? But I thought Jamie was and I didn't mean to be. Um. Rude."

[multiplez]

"It's cool," Z assured her. "I probably should have known it. But my parents kept me out of nursery school for various reasons and then. Um. Let's not talk about this. I'm sure Jamie knows it and wants to help teach me, don't you, Jamie Chihuahua?"

[the_merriest]

"It'd make her feel way better," Rikku promised. "Okay! So!"

She posed and made sad, sad eyes at the Jamhuahua until he sat straight up in a way that might, if you were squinting, resemble the proper starting pose.

"Iiiiiii'm a little tea-pot! Short and stout!
Here is my handle, here is my spout!"

There were some grudging AROOOOOOOOOs from the Jamhuahua.

This was going to make such a great video.

[multiplez]

It totally was. Z beamed down at the Jamhuahua in what she hoped was an encouraging, as opposed to simply manic with glee, way.

[the_merriest]

"When I get all steamed up, hear - me - shout!
TIP! me over and pour - me - out!"

Rikku's singing was enthusiastic. The howling of Jamie the chihuahua, less so. But it was nearly in tune and he was such a cute little chihuahua in his dress that really, the overall effect was superb.

"Thaaaaaaaaaank you," Rikku said, giving him an exaggerated bow. "See? That wasn't so bad!"

[multiplez]

"That was awesome," Z praised.

Jamie was never going to forgive her, was he?

[the_merriest]

Probably not any time soon. He was so cute when he was grumpy!

"I really think the floppy hat sells it," she sighed. "Adds that zing."

[sarcasm-guy.livejournal.com]

Sokka was out doing the wandering-the-halls thing when something caught his eye. "HEY, how come you got to keep yours? Turtle made me give mine back!"

[the_merriest]

"Because mine's not a dupe," she grinned. "And because Turtle and I owe Jamie, and payback's a bitch. And not the fun chihuahua kind, either."

[sarcasm-guy.livejournal.com]

Sokka blinked at her. "I'm sorry, what? What does Jamie have to do with Turtle's dog rental?"

[the_merriest]

Rikku stared at him. "You ... didn't know?" she giggled. "Oh, man, that makes it even more fun. Say hi, Jamie!"

The Jamhuahua was not enjoying this as much as Rikku was.

[sarcasm-guy.livejournal.com]

Sokka stared at her. And looked down at the dog.

And broke out laughing.

"Did... Did you see... what Turtle did to them?" he asked, once he could breathe again. "Them. Him. Them. ...Does he count as one person or several when he pulls a Madrox?"

[the_merriest]

"I have no idea," Rikku giggled. "I know what he did to us, and he's paying for it. Ohhhh, is he paying for it. Whatever it is, I'm gonna be ticked if she didn't get any footage."

[sarcasm-guy.livejournal.com]

Sokka kept chuckling. "If I had known..." He grinned. "She dyed all the dupes different colors, and put ribbons and glitter on them, and rented them out! I just thought... It was... She..."

He burst out laughing again.

[the_merriest]

"Oh my gosh, that's awesome," Rikku laughed. "I was just gonna tape him doing stupid stuff and then sell the tapes. Or maybe hand them out, I mean, I don't need the money and people should see this. Lots of them. Right?"

She eyed Jamhuahua again, sighing happily. "I don't think Jamie's gonna mess with me or Turtle again."

[sarcasm-guy.livejournal.com]

Sokka scratched his head. "Why would you think that?"

[the_merriest]

Rikku rolled her eyes. "Right. Male. Sorry."

[sarcasm-guy.livejournal.com]

Sokka raised an eyebrow at her. "Do you mean you think I'm stupid, or do you mean that you HONESTLY believe Jamie's not going to get revenge for this, or are you trying to babble something insane about the post office?"

[the_merriest]

"A, you're male, so you are stupid. B, he might, but he should know better by now, as we're better at revenge than he is. And C, I like the post office."

Well, she did.

[sarcasm-guy.livejournal.com]

"Oh, yeah?!?! Well, I --"

Sokka cocked his head, considering her points. And couldn't find fault with any of them.

"Okay, fine. Whatever. But I'll have you know the post office is much less cool now that I'm not working there anymore!"